Benefits of Being a Good Listener
There are numerous benefits associated with being a good listener. People with refined listening skills can help others feel secure in expressing their opinions. They may also be better able to reduce tension during arguments and communicate respect to the speaker. Other potential benefits include being more likable, building stronger relationships, and having a clearer understanding of what’s being discussed.
- Good listeners are more likable. Individuals with strong listening skills are present in the conversation. People who listen with focus are often perceived as more likable.
- Good listeners build stronger relationships. Communication is not a one-way street. Good listeners show interest, ask open-ended questions, and acknowledge what’s being said. This helps reduce misunderstandings and builds stronger relationships.
- Good listeners have a clearer understanding of the topics being discussed. Individuals with refined listening skills seek to fully understand a speaker’s message. They pay attention to both verbal and nonverbal cues and ask for clarification when needed.
General Listening Types:
The two main types of listening - the foundations of all listening sub-types are:
- Discriminative Listening
- Comprehensive Listening
Discriminative Listening
Discriminative listening is first developed at a very early age – perhaps even before birth, in the womb. This is the most basic form of listening and does not involve the understanding of the meaning of words or phrases but merely the different sounds that are produced. In early childhood, for example, a distinction is made between the sounds of the voices of the parents – the voice of the father sounds different to that of the mother.
Discriminative listening develops through childhood and into adulthood. As we grow older and develop and gain more life experience, our ability to distinguish between different sounds is improved. Not only can we recognise different voices, but we also develop the ability to recognise subtle differences in the way that sounds are made – this is fundamental to ultimately understanding what these sounds mean. Differences include many subtleties, recognising foreign languages, distinguishing between regional accents and clues to the emotions and feelings of the speaker.
Being able to distinguish the subtleties of sound made by somebody who is happy or sad, angry or stressed, for example, ultimately adds value to what is actually being said and, of course, does aid comprehension. When discriminative listening skills are combined with visual stimuli, the resulting ability to ‘listen’ to body-language enables us to begin to understand the speaker more fully – for example recognising somebody is sad despite what they are saying or how they are saying it.
Example
Imagine yourself surrounded by people who are speaking a language that you cannot understand. Perhaps passing through an airport in another country. You can probably distinguish between different voices, male and female, young and old and also gain some understanding about what is going on around you based on the tone of voice, mannerisms and body language of the other people. You are not understanding what is being said but using discriminative listening to gain some level of comprehension of your surroundings.
Comprehensive Listening
Comprehensive listening involves understanding the message or messages that are being communicated. Like discriminative listening, comprehensive listening is fundamental to all listening sub-types.
In order to be able use comprehensive listening and therefore gain understanding the listener first needs appropriate vocabulary and language skills. Using overly complicated language or technical jargon, therefore, can be a barrier to comprehensive listening. Comprehensive listening is further complicated by the fact that two different people listening to the same thing may understand the message in two different ways. This problem can be multiplied in a group setting, like a classroom or business meeting where numerous different meanings can be derived from what has been said.
Comprehensive listening is complimented by sub-messages from non-verbal communication, such as the tone of voice, gestures and other body language. These non-verbal signals can greatly aid communication and comprehension but can also confuse and potentially lead to misunderstanding. In many listening situations it is vital to seek clarification and use skills such as reflection aid comprehension.
Tips for successful communication to different listening styles in the clinical laboratory.
Those who have developed or grown up in an environment where a specific concept is the norm must remember that communication fails without a base understanding. Effective communication requires that one never assumes that the listener listens from the same mental place from which the speaker speaks.
There is a series of events that take place internally before you even utter a word. Pay attention to your internal process. What do you think about before you speak? Are you considering who you are speaking to? Do not change who you are, but allow your thought process to engage and develop.
As you prepare to communicate, educate yourself about the listener. Prioritize your audience and customize your message and delivery. Take a look at the individual or the audience and ask yourself if they fit into one of the several categories of listener. Stop, think and formulate a message to strike the heart of the individual listener. If there is more than one person in the audience, then your message will have to be delivered to reach each person as you speak to them all. Take a look around the crowd.
As you consider the following list, think of people in your life. Who do you know that fits most often into one of the categories? Start communicating by thinking about how that individual is best addressed.
The Active Listener
This individual will listen to you and hang on your every word. They will take in your message and listen attentively. They often show signs of response—either physically or verbally—to reassure you they are listening. The active listener will also be the first person to verbally give you feedback to assure you they understand. This is the Holy Grail of audiences.
The Inactive Listener
Contrarily, this is the speaker’s worst nightmare. The listener truly allows the words to flow in one ear and out the other. Commonly, the inactive listener is far away in another place daydreaming or solving other problems. This listener is not really listening, they are not present. They may be waiting for their turn to speak.
The Selective Listener
As the name implies, this listener is waiting to hear what they expect to hear—or what they want to hear. A selective listener only hears information needed to formulate a counter argument, or may filter your words until he feels like he has achieved base comprehension to his satisfaction.
The Rushed Listener
Much like an inactive listener, a rushed listener will listen only as far as is needed to get the gist of what is being said. Then, they can transition comfortably into an inactive listener.
The Scared Listener
This is really a subcategory of the selective listener, but this listener is focused on avoiding harm. Someone who is fearful of being criticized or rejected may only hear those words and phrases they feel they must defend against. Thus, you will be speaking to a selective listener in self-defense mode.
The Thoughtful Listener
This is a person who would otherwise be an active listener, and they will give you signs of a concurrence and support, but their only goal is to please you. Accordingly, they become a selective listener who filters out those things they must do in order to make you happy. The message gets lost in their thoughtfulness.
The “Uneducated” Listener
This is not a listener uneducated in an academic sense. This is a listener who is uneducated as to the arena in which you are speaking.
Now, it is time for you to deliver your message. You have considered who you are, what you have to communicate and the type of listener or listeners who will hear you speak. How will you keep the listener’s attention? Use all the tools at your disposal.
- Vocal. By using tone and volume, we avoid monotony and rhythmically keep an audience listening.
- Remaining Stationary Versus Moving Around. In a longer presentation, controlled movement may aid in keeping attention. In short presentations, keeping focus as you stand firmly, may add to the importance of the message.
- Demonstrative items. If you hold up a report, use slides or displays. It makes your presentation more attractive. Everyone has had an experience where someone tries to explain a situation using the salt-and-pepper shakers as people. Using props allows your audience to visualize your example.
- Feed their heads. Use a clear and concise vocabulary. Give your audience something their minds can digest and remember. On the laboratory floor, you will build a better relationship by telling them that they have greater production and teamwork than anyone else in the business.
- Something to remember. Relate what you have to say to an anchor that exists in the listeners mind. It may be a comparison to a past experience or a past success. Show them the big picture.
By weaving together all of these considerations, you will create a tapestry that will cover a larger range of listeners. In the event of a one-on-one conversation, a few moments of observation will tell you who you are speaking to and what to say to get them to understand. Take time to pay attention to your communication process, and then listen before you speak. You will hear volumes that allow you to communicate much more successfully.
Active Listening: Key to Effective Communication
Published November 16, 2019 · Updated May 19, 2021
Active listening, also called effective or attentive listening is a way of learning through conversation. Active communication requires comprehending the message by going beyond words to intention and non-verbal communication.
Learning to listen in communication unleashes creative energy and enables productive collaboration that forms the basis of meaningful relationships. It can enable powerful coaching which can lead to better problem solving.
The feeling of not being heard can stop people from sharing or withholding useful information thereby preventing us from seeing a better version of reality. Active listening on the other hand unlocks the natural flow from inside to the outside as it builds a connection through trust.
Our cognitive biases in the form of personal filters through our thoughts and beliefs can impede communication. Most of the time we simply hear the other person, apply the information in our context and think about what to say next [yes, we do it all the time] even before the other person has finished speaking.
Cognitive bias impedes our ability to listen to what the other person has to say or in some cases intends to say. We do selective listening with the belief that we already know enough and choose to remember only the information relevant to us.
This isn’t active listening!
What Stephen R. Covey writes in his book, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People is so relevant to effective communication “Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply”
Why is listening so important in life and at work?
Listening is a key component of effectivecommunication skills.
Without listening, you can’t understand what other people are really trying to say. It’s easy to get something wrong and make assumptions.
On the other hand, when you actively listen, you can fully communicate with someone else.
Listening is the most important part of communication. That’s because it allows you to come up with a substantial and meaningful response. You can pick up on subtleties you wouldn’t have otherwise,especially with body language.
If something isn’t clear, you can ask clarifying questions. This is something you might not have done without active listening.
At work, communication is an important soft skill. According to LinkedIn's 2019 Global Talent Trends report, 80% of companies say that soft skills are increasingly important to their success.
Listening is also important forproductive collaboration.
According to the same LinkedIn report, collaboration is the third most important soft skill companies need.
Imagine trying to collaborate if you can’t actively listen to your colleagues. Information gets lost, and misunderstandings occur.
The same can happen if everyone on the team uses different levels of listening. Some people will be more engaged than others. Not everyone will get the same understanding of the same conversation.
You can avoid this if everyone actively listens to each other.
Plus, when you actively listen, your colleagues and your superiors will notice that you come up with meaningful responses.
Listening is also crucial if you want to learn effectively.
Without attentive listening, it can be easy to miss small details that make a difference in your learning.
Active listening games
You can improve team communication with active listening games.
In one such game, you and your colleagues can split up into groups of two. The first person in each group is given a picture, while the other person is given a pen and paper.
The second participant needs to ask questions in order to accurately draw the image the first participant is holding.
In another game, participants need to mime non-verbal cues to express their feelings about a topic. The other participants need to write down what they believe the other person feels.
Finally, you can practice active listening by having all participants listen to one person speak for three to five minutes. During this time, no other participants may speak. Afterwards, the other participants need to paraphrase what they think the other person said.