What strategy helps ensure active listening?

4Strategiesfor Effective Listening

1. First of all, listening is an activity; it is not something we do passively. The skill of active listening needs to be applied, be there and stay focused on the person talking, without any distractions. You need to practice active listening daily to get better at it. It requires us to ask questions and give feedback. So here are four basic goals of good listening to consider when entering a conversation:
   - To understand someone
   - To enjoy someone
   - To learn something
   - To give help or solace

   Paraphrasing is a basic tool we often use to listen well. We might use phrases like these:
   - In other words, did you mean…?
   - So how you felt about it was…?
   - Did you mean…?
   - I think what I am hearing you say is…?
   - Correct me if I am wrong…?

   Paraphrasing defines common ground, lets the other person know you understand what it is they are communicating, and it helps them feel understood and appreciated. Listening is a leadership skill that is often overlooked.
   

2. Listen with empathy. This requires us to recognize, acceptand understand that we are doing the best we can and so are others. Try to put yourself in the other individual’s shoes and give him or her the benefit of the doubt. Try to understand where someone else is coming from and treat him or her with kindness as you take in the message. Ask what difficulties the other person is experiencing, and this will help you hear his or her message. Pay attention to their body language, keep an open mind and be careful not to jump to conclusions.
   
3. Be open as you listen. Be careful not to judge and put on your critical parent hat. Do not make your mind up too quickly as you take in the information. Give yourself some time to think and reflect. Try not to come to conclusions too quickly and develop a definitive position based on what you are hearing. Allow yourself to consider different perspectives. Whenever possible have the meeting face to face, or with video conferencing if in person isn't possible, so that you can better understand their thoughts and feelings being expressed nonverbally.
   
4. Listen with awareness.There are two parts to this; compare what is said to your own knowledge, history, people, and the way the world operates; and secondly listen and observe for congruence. Watch for visual cues and try to determine if they match the information you were hearing. Effective communication is a two-way street so make sure that you let them know that they were heard and understood before moving to a new topic.

Here are a Few More Effective Listening Skills:

1. Maintain good eye contact - while not staring.
2. Lean in slightly while not encroaching on someone’s personal space.
3. Reinforce by paraphrasing and giving feedback at the right time.
4. Ask clarifying questions.
5. Try to eliminate distractions and be in the moment.
6. Be committed to understanding the other person.
7. Don't forget about the 5 C's of Leadership Accountability to ensure people do what they say they're going to do.
8. Pay attention to the facial expressions and other nonverbal communication
9. Make sure that you are fulling paying attention, not just hearing the words, but understanding them and their context.
10. Let them know you are actively listening with saying words like uh uh, okay, tell me more, let's dive into that, etc.
11. Put your focus on the speaker, make sure that you give them with your full attention. Don't get distracted by your phone or any other attention stealing objects!
12. Use your effective listening skills to build a human relationship with your colleagues and get a deeper understanding of the situation.
13. Make sure that you ask for additional information if you need it, or find an especially interested topic in your conversation to help show your engagement.
14. Don't try to think about what you are going to say while the other person is talking, stay fully engaged in what they are saying. You'll have plenty of time to offer input later.

Please consider these tips as you enter your next conversation and ask yourself if you are using any of them. It might help you better understand and be better understood.

Need help getting your team aligned to achieve your growth goals? Rhythm systems software was ranked the #1 easiest software to use, highest ROI, fastest implementation, and highest adoption rate on G2.

Want more information on Team Accountability? Check out these additional resources:

The Power of Systems and People:Accountable Leaders and Teams

Listen Up - A Critical Leadership Skill

Take OurTeam Accountability Assessment

Team Accountability Begins with Personal Accountability

How top CEOs Close the Strategy Execution Gap

Building Team Accountability: Job Scorecards

10 Signs of an Accountable Culture [Infographic]

Growing Team Accountability in Your Organization

Quick Tips for Building Accountability

5 Steps to Having an Accountability Discussion [Video]

Learn more aboutaccountable leaders and teams.

Photo Credit:iStockby Getty Images

Improve Your Active Listening Skills With These 13 Strategies

Forbes Coaches Council

COUNCIL POST

Expertise from Forbes Councils members, operated under license. Opinions expressed are those of the author.

Leadership

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Expert Panel, Forbes Coaches Council

Top business and career coaches from Forbes Coaches Council offer firsthand insights on leadership

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Leaders have an overwhelming number of responsibilities, often distracting or isolating them from others. Unfortunately, this sometimes impacts their ability to truly hear their team's concerns and suggestions. They might have good intentions and ask for their workers’ feedback, but are they really absorbing and acting on that information?

If you’re a leader struggling to stay focused, make sure you first prioritizeyourpeople and truly hear what they are telling you. Below, 10 members ofForbes Coaches Councilshared ways to practiceactivelisteningso you won’t have to miss a word.

Members of Forbes Coaches Council share their insight.

1. Listen For Both Subtext And Context

To listen well, pay attention to nonverbal communication [the subtext] in addition to the words the speaker is saying [the context]. The underlying meaning the speaker reveals from nonverbal cues can be powerful to help you learn more and connect more deeply. This can be an extended pause, facial expression, vocal tone, etc. Pointing out what the listener isn't saying will enrichyourrelationship. -Lisa Downs,Downs Leadership

2. Learn To P.A.C.E. The Conversation

Open, two-way verbal communication is the foundation of building rapport. Using the PACE formula maximizes interactions and improvesactivelistening. Purpose: Determine the purpose or core of their message. Ask: Respond with a question to dig deeper and encourage more dialog. Connect: Evaluate their body language to confirm rapport or connection. Encourage: Thank them for their input. -Lisa K McDonald,Career Polish, Inc.

3. Get [And Stay] Curious

The definition of curious is "eager to know or learn something." If we stay curious during a conversation, we are motivated to connect more deeply with what we hear and ask interesting questions to learn more. If this feels unnatural, start to practice by simply asking, "I'm curious to hear more about..." Try to stay focused and get curious again if you noticeyourlisteningdeclines. -Bonnie Davis,Destination Up

4. Develop Empathy

Having empathy for the speaker naturally allows one to validate what they are saying and be attentiveto their feelings -- two key ingredients toactivelistening. You can develop empathy simply by asking yourself, "How would I feel if I were that person?" Not only will they feel heard, but you can effectively gauge the appropriate response based on the situation. -Laura Berger,Berdeo Group

Forbes Coaches Council is an invitation-only community for leading business and career coaches. Do I qualify?

5. Pay Attention ToYourOwn Body Language And Posture

Body language sends a message to the speaker, and internally, to you. Whenyourposture is off, you're notlistening. Changeyourposture, changeyourfocus. Fixyourattention on the person who is speaking. Do more than look. If it's a phone call, turn away from the computer. In a meeting, turnyourchair. Sit up, get straight, get squared, let go ofyourshoulders and focus completely on the speaker. -Evan Weselake,GetPureFocus

6. Breathe Deeply And Slowly WhileListening

Breathing deep and slow whilelisteningcalmsyourmind, which allows for the ears to "open." It soothes the speaker along with yourself. You're creating a better environmentfor connection and understanding. -Sharon Sayler,Competitive Edge Communications

7. Get Rid OfYourDistractions

We have so many things that inundate us: emails, phone, text, Slack, last-minute meetings -- the list goes on. When talking with someone, be present. Be anactivelistener and willing to look them in the eye, and be with them for the time you are talking. Don't allow other things to distract you. Share with themyourunderstanding of what they said. -Stephanie Vaughan,One Source Coaching

8. Stop Talking

Sure, you're smart. Of course, you have more ideas, suggestions and experiences to share. But leadership is not a solo sport. Shut up and get comfortable with the silence. When you create space for others to step in, you'll start teaching others that their ideas, suggestions, and experiences matter, too. -Darcy Eikenberg,Red Cape Revolution

9. Become Aware Of WhereYourMind Is During A Conversation

Self-awareness, particularly awareness of whereyourmind is in the moment, is critical. Isyourmind wandering? Are you starting to think about a response? Are you empathizing with the person speaking? Being aware of whereyourattention lies is critical. Of course, when you first start,yourattention may be asking yourselfthesequestions, but as you do, you will build new habits. -Larry Boyer,Success Rockets LLC

10. Write Down A Summary OfYourSession

A powerful habit of a great leader is to write down a summary of what you heard when you meet withyourpeople. A positive, thoughtful and accurate written summary can be time-consuming and inconvenient, but when done right, it documents the session and givesyouraudience a chance to possess what you have talked about in a tactile way. Most leaders don't do this but maybe you really should. -John M. O'Connor,Career Pro Inc.

11. Repeat Back What The Other Person Says To Confirm Understanding

I've found the best way to reflectively listen is to respond by saying: "So, what I think I'm hearing you say is..." Then I ask, "Have I got that right?" This accomplishes two things: First, it lets the person know they've been heard, which makes them feel respected, and second, it lets the person know you understand, demonstrating openness. -Gregg Ward,The Gregg Ward Group

12. Center Yourself Before The Conversation

If you try to appear as if you're activelylisteningbut you're actually workingyourbody language to look like it, you need to stop; you're wasting everyone's time. Consider consciously centering yourself before entering a conversation in which you have a tendency to check out. Or, be upfront aboutyourneed to keep the conversation to a time minimum, then commit to concentrating. -Sarah Beth Aubrey,Aubrey Coaching & Training ACT, LLC

13. Turn Off 'Problem-Solving' Mode

Leaders often want to jump and help solve the problem, when many times, people simply want to be heard and have the opportunity to share their thoughts.So let them. The key toactivelisteningis to stop talking and stop thinking about talking. Allow others to speak without worrying about whatyourown response will be. Just focus on what they are saying and try to understand their perspective. -Tonya Echols,Thrive Coaching Solutions

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5 Active Listening Strategies That Work

by Janelle Cox, Education Writer, M.A.Ed

A while back, I was co-teaching a third-grade bilingual summer school class in a low-income urban setting. I didn't speak any Spanish except for a few words I remembered from a class I took in high school. I found myself, as well as my co-teacher, having a hard time getting the students to listen. They had become so reliant on us repeating ourselves that it just became part of our daily structure. I wanted to encourage active listening, so I decided to try a few different strategies. Here are five ways that I got my students to actively listen that summer.

What Is Active Listening? How Can I Do It Better?

What Is Active Listening?

Active listening requires you to listen attentively to a speaker, understand what they’re saying, respond and reflect on what’s being said, and retain the information for later. This keeps both listener and speaker actively engaged in the conversation.

The listener may use active listening techniques like paying close attention to the speaker’s behavior and body language in order to gain a better understanding of their message — and may signal that they’re following along with visual cues such as nodding, eye contact, or avoiding potential interruptions, like fidgeting and pacing.

If you want to try growing your active listening skillset and you’re ready totake the active listening challenge,read on!

Using Active Listening to Coach Others Takes Intentional Effort

While important, active listening and reflecting, responding, and giving feedback aren’t always easy. Daily pressures and demands often overtake our work, leaving limited time and energy to focus on slowing down to really listen to, and coach, direct reports.

Yet while time for formal coaching sessions may be limited, you can fit in coaching moments and coaching conversations. The trick is to be an attentive listener and have your toolkit of active listening techniques at the ready for whenever such moments occur.

Unlike critical listening, an active listener is not trying to evaluate the message and offer their own opinion, but rather, to simply make the speaker feel heard and validated.

At CCL, we help leaders go beyond basic active listening skills so that they’re better equipped to truly listen to understand others — including the facts, feelings, and values that may be hidden behind the words actually being shared. At the organizational level, this is how to build a workplace culture of truth and courage.

The Purpose & Benefits of Active Listening

Before we dive into specific active listening techniques and how to improve your active listening skills, it’s important to take a step back and understand why they matter.

First, when a leader engages in active listening, it helps establish trust between both parties, shows empathy for others, and fosters psychological safety. Being a thoughtful listener, asking questions, seeking clarification, and encouraging others to share their perspective and will reinforce your role as a spouse, friend, colleague, coach, and mentor.

Being a strong, attentive listener who can provide effective feedback will also enable you to coach your people more effectively. Your co-workers and direct reports will respect you more, and you’ll likely see improvements in your relationships with them as a result.

Once you begin to put the active listening skillset into practice, you’ll notice the positive impact it has in a number of areas, including in personal and professional relationships, at work, and in various social situations.

How to Practice Active Listening

Active listening involves more than just hearing someone speak. Here are some active listening techniques to master.

Pay Attention [and Show It]

Concentrate fully on what is being said. Listen with all your senses and give your full attention to the speaker. Put away your phone, ignore distractions, avoid daydreaming, and shut down your internal dialogue.

To show the person you're truly tuned in, look at them and be mindful of nonverbal behaviors. Use open, non-threatening body language. Avoid folding your arms. Smile, lean in, and nod at key junctures. Consciously control your facial expressions, avoiding any that convey negative impressions.

Making eye contact is especially important. In general, aim to maintain it for 60% to 70% of the time you spend listening.

Reflect What You Hear

Paraphrase what the person has said, rather than offering unsolicited advice or opinions. For example, you might say, "In other words, what you are saying is that you're frustrated" or "I'm hearing that you're frustrated about this situation." Summarize what you've heard. Mirroring what the person has said helps them feel validated and understood.

Withhold Judgment

Remain neutral and non-judgmental in your responses so that the person feels safe enough to continue sharing their thoughts. Make the conversation a safe zone where the person can trust they won't be shamed, criticized, blamed, or otherwise negatively received.

Ask Open-Ended Questions

Avoid "yes or no" questions; they often produce dead-end answers. Instead, ask open-ended questions about the person to show you are interested in them and to encourage thoughtful, expansive responses.

If you'd like to better understand something the person has said, ask for clarification. But don't focus so much on insignificant details that you miss the big picture.

Be Patient

Don't interrupt, fill periods of silence with speech, finish the person's sentences, or top the story [for example, saying "that reminds me of the time I..."]. Similarly, listen to understand, not to respond. That is, don't prepare a reply while the other person is still speaking; the last thing they say might change the meaning of what they've already said. Don't change the subject abruptly; this conveys boredom and impatience.

When you listen actively, you are fully engaged and immersed in what the other person is saying.

Much like a therapist listening to a client, you are there to act as a sounding board rather than to jump in with your own ideas and opinions about what is being said.